Tips for the Holidays with the In-laws

Tips for the Holidays with the In-laws

You never really win with your in-laws. No matter you much you love them, worse if you hate them – they can always leave you feeling uneasy and squeamish, especially when you are in their home for the holidays.

When you married your spouse, you also married his/her family, so they say. Thus, spending the holidays with them is just normal. But what do you do when you do not really get along with your spouse’s parents.

Family Christmas1.Prepare for the visit.

Every visit should be given a good plan. Especially, if you have kids then you need to pack for the travel – you need to list the hundreds of things you need to bring.

Think through why you were uneasy with your in –law, was it just imagination or you can really see that they didn’t like. If this is true plan on how to get along better with them.

If you are with your children, prepare materials for activities that you can engage them in while you are traveling or even during those dull moments in the in-laws’ house.

2. Be open to different opportunities to help out

You should prepare yourself to be the lead in the cooking of the meals and maybe an assistant also. You can always pitch in for the expenses for the food. After the festivities, it is always helpful if everyone helps out to decrease the stress of cleaning up the mess. Even the children can help.

3. Be sensitive to the tradition of the families.

For sure, you also have your own sets of tradition but make sure to respect the existing ones in the in-laws. You should not impose your value system. Allow them to act the way they wanted to be. You are married to such family and you are also part of their tradition (including your kids!). You should also orient the kids on what they can expect in coming to the in-laws’ house and they should be expecting when they are there. Teach kids to be respectful and mindful of their environment and the people around them. This is a good time to be teaching your children on how to interact with the relatives and you’re in-laws.

4. Have fun.

The holidays are for having fun with the families, in-laws or not. Things should be a breeze when you have prepared for it. Yet, you should also be ready and accept the inevitable things that come your way.

 

 

 

 

 

Do people question your interracial dating choices?

Do people question your interracial dating choices?

Much as interracial dating has gained popularity, there are a few people who still question the intentions of couples who date interracially. They just don’t want to believe that the main reason behind this couples being together is purely for love.

Now, there are many questions that interracial couples are bombarded with, some that are quite annoying. All these are based on stereotypes and biases that society holds about interracial couples.

The status question:

There is this assumption that when a minority dates a white person, they are doing it in order to upgrade their status. This kind of thinking is so retrogressive. There are so many people who are very wealthy and they happened to fall in love with a white person. This doesn’t fly anymore.

self hateThe “Do you hate your race” question:

Some people are still stuck with the mentality that people who date interracially do it because they hate men and women of their own race. This is tied to the question: “You just couldn’t find someone from your own ethnicity?”. It is never like this. People just meet and fall genuinely in love. There is nothing wrong with a person dating someone simply because they clicked and they treat them well.

Dating interracially to have cute mixed babies.

This one is kind of tied to the one about hating one’s own race. The rationale people apply here is that one hates their own race so much so that they don’t want their children to look like them. So they marry interracially, specifically to get cute babies. Really? Mixed or not, if you are black or white, your kid will definitely pick some of the features that one has. They won’t be too different. It’s called genetics people.

asian woman

It must be a fetish.

Yes, there are some individuals who are inclined to dating people from a particular race. But does it really mean they fetishize them? I beg to differ. There are certain features that someone can be attracted to. And some races have very distinct features. An example is Asians. So if these features are what makes you tick, how is that a fetish? If you love women with silky blonde hair, you will definitely date a white person. It’s not always a fetish. The same reasons one might be attracted to a person of their own race are the same reasons that apply to interracial dating.

 

A few lies women may use on their first interracial date

A few lies women may use on their first interracial date

Creating an impression on your dream man is not easy especially on your first interracial date since the stakes to keep your best in front are high. This leads to undue pressure on most women and they may sometimes under pressure lie about a few things which may be harmless but leave a bad taste if found out later. Men need not worry if they caught their woman lying on the first interracial date and can pass it away as something which happened under pressure. Men need to keep their sixth sense active and read her body signs while she is talking to sense if she really means whatever she is saying.

first dateShe may lie about her love for outdoors on the first interracial date

Girls especially the ones who have just been out of their teens or have not dated seriously so far, will lie about their love for outdoors. They may portray themselves as someone who loves to go out and explore the world. They may even sync their hobbies in a way which makes the man believe that they love exciting and adventurous activities outdoors. Chances are she is not really an outdoors person and is lying just to keep your attention.

She may lie about her appetite on the first interracial date

Girls and women love food. However they think their table manners on the first date are far more important than the hunger pangs they may be suffering. On the first interracial date a woman will surely tend to eat less than her normal appetite to give an impression of demure and conservative attitude. Girls love food however they will never show it on the first interracial date. If you are eating out make sure you order something delicious and in small quantity since she is not going to eat much.

Lying about drinking is normal

She may deny drinking at all. Chances are that she is not going to admit to her share of getting wasted at parties because of alcohol even if she admits to drinking at parties. The reason is the impression she is looking forward to build on you. Girls have an impression that guys don’t like girls who can’t handle their alcohol.

Dietary lies are far too common on first interracial dates

No woman will ever let you feel that she is conscious regarding her figure and give you an impression that she does not care about her diet. However the reality is that women tend to take very good care of their duet. They watch out for each calorie that is added to their body and try to remain in the best shape whether they are dating or not. On the first interracial date if the conversation goes in the way of dietary habits your woman is going to seem disinterested and give you an impression she does not care or watch out her diet.

 

Maintaining intimacy in a long distance interracial dating relation

Maintaining intimacy in a long distance interracial dating relation

Being in a long distance interracial dating relation is not everybody’s cup of tea. Still you will find a lot of couples that have been into long distance interracial relationship with success. Apart from love for each other these couples do make a few extra efforts to keep the relationship intact. Intimacy is something that lacks in these long distance interracial dating relations. To keep the intimacy alive with your partner you need to go that extra mile. The effort to keep the relationship alive and happening rests with both the partners since a relationship is a two way process. Keeping intimacy and love alive and intact is not a tough task although.

interracial loveVisiting your partner in an interracial dating relation is important

Visiting your partner often will keep the intimacy alive. You may be living at a distance from each other due to your work, college or other family obligations still it is important to visit your dating partner whenever you get time. Scheduling your work and love life is in your hands and prioritizing your date is important for intimacy and keeping the relationship alive. Plan ahead and make sure your partner is free when you are visiting and vice versa. An element of surprise once or twice will surely make sparks fly. If your visit is short, try and make the most out of it.

Communication is key in a long distance interracial dating relation

Take time to talk to each other means you care for your partner. Talk as frequently as you can. Don’t worry about the content of the conversation since the conversation is going to shape up itself. Make sure to video chat whenever you have the option, time and chance. Exchange texts and photographs with each other. Any visual contact you have with your date is going to ensure that you remain close at least virtually till the time you meet in person.

Do things together even when far apart

Although it may sound a bit absurd but it works wonderfully. Time your meals in such a way that you can have them together at different places. Exchange photos of food you are having. Watch movies or games together and set up a call at that time so that you are together virtually and enjoy each other’s company. In case you are visiting a new place alone set up a video call with your date to enjoy each other’s company at a new place.

Gifts mean I care

Presents even the small ones have a clear cut message that you care for your date. It is important to exchange presents on major occasions like birthdays and Christmas however small gifts without any reason received in the mail always get butterflies into the stomach of the receiver. Anything you gift needs to be accompanied with a message that communicates your feelings along with the gift you are presenting to your interracial date. While receiving a gift or gifting something do not for the monetary value of the present instead focus on the feelings and the message you are putting across or reciving from your date.

 

Is it Beneficial to use Interracial Dating Sites?

Is it Beneficial to use Interracial Dating Sites?

Over the past few years the world of internet dating services have become more and more popular, the options that are available are everything from Christian dating sites to interracial dating services it all depends on what you are looking for in a mate. When it comes to interracial dating sites there are some that want to exactly what is meant by “interracial” and how society perceives this type of match.

 

The definition of interracial dating is when two people that are from two different ethnic groups go out on a date. Most of the time the racial or ethnic difference are very noticeable such as a difference in skin tone, values that are portrayed, or facial attributes; most commonly this is associated with the pairing between blacks and whites.

A Little History of Interracial Dating

There was a time when interracial dating was a taboo concept in America; this is because white people believed that they should only socialize or have relationships with people from their own race. This excluded all blacks from mingling with their white counterparts; this was never more obvious than in the days of segregation. During this period blacks were not allow to even step foot in an establishment meant for whites; each race had their own area when it came to patronizing business establishments or using public facilities.

Times have changes now that most Americans have begun to break down the barriers between the races and interracial relationships have become more common. The number of interracial marriages has increased dramatically because it is no longer stigmatized and in some cases is even encouraged.

The Truth behind Interracial Dating

While relationships between whites and blacks, comically referred to as salt and pepper dating, are one of the most common forms of interracial dating and marriages it not the only form that it takes, the merging of any two ethnic groups including Hispanics, Mexicans, and Europeans are also in this classification. It is actually more common for these relationships to result in cohabitation and sexual relationships without the need to actually commit to marriage, however when this does occur it is known as interracial marriage.

Interracial Dating Services

There are many online dating services that cater to those who are searching for an interracial relationship, even if they are searching for a Christian mate. These services are offered on a trial basis, for free, and even for a small fee depending on which option you prefer to use. Those who opt to use this type of dating service can easily log into their chosen dating site and find others looking for Christian mates, companionship, marriage, romance, or courtship. These sites will cater to individuals who are single, senior citizens, and those who are married but looking for a relationship outside of their existing relationship.

The Advantages and Disadvantages of Interracial Dating

As with any type of relationship there are both pros and cons to interracial dating. It is important to weigh both sides of the coin before you commit to this type of relationship.

The pros:

•Couples generally have a mutual respect for one another.
•The opportunity to understand and involve yourself in another culture or race.
•Some say that it is much easier to find an individual who will become their lifelong partner.

The cons:

•Individual’s attitudes tend to be bias.
•They maybe issues with friends and family on both sides of the relationship.
•Negativity can be present in the relationship, because of ingrained differences.
•The differences when it comes to stigmas, child care, and patience can be drastically different.

Some Common Problems with Interracial Dating

Even today public perception of interracial couples varies widely from the comical to the vicious and sometimes violent responses that you may encounter. It is important to discuss the possible social backlash that you may encounter even if you were matched on a Christian dating site.

Public perception coupled with the differences in values on either side of the relationship can be problematic. The reason this can be a problem is because each race or ethnic group deals with daily life very differently; knowing and compromising on these differences can make the relationship stronger instead of tearing it apart.

One common problem that arises maybe with submission especially in the Asian community. Asian women tend to be more submissive to their male counterparts, while those from other ethnic groups may not portray this trait. The differences may also extend to the bedroom and if the results of those acts. It is always better to have open and honest communication so these differences do not put a wedge between the individuals who are in the relationship.

While online dating services offer anything that you are looking for from Christian dating sites to interracial relationships it is important to remember that the services only job is to get couples together, but it is up to them to make a relationship work.

Keeping your interracial relationship meaningful with time

Keeping your interracial relationship meaningful with time

You have got out of the excitement of the first and second date of an interracial relationship. You are in a relationship with the person whom you found on an interracial dating website. Your expectations have been met. Both of you are going around and people around you have started recognising

you as a couple. Still there are things that need to be taken care of especially in an interracial relationship that will go a long way in deciding how far you can take your relationship. Make sure you make the right moves and manage your relationship in a manner so that you are able to manage your interracial relationship in the right direction. There are things that you need to know once you are in an interracial relationship that are going to keep you in the right spirit and provide a right direction to the interracial relationship you are in.

Cheating in an interracial relationship is not acceptable

infidelityCheating on your partner is not acceptable in any relationship. It works the same for interracial relationships. Cheating even to get even with your cheating interracial relationship partner is not something you should be doing. It is better to get out of a relationship where you feel an urge of cheating your partner. In case you find out that your interracial dating partner is cheating on you for someone else get out of the relationship. Cheating is the real deal breaker in interracial relationships. Do not cheat and do not take cheating lightly.

Do not accept disrespectful behavior in an interracial relationship

Respect in interracial relationships is very important since this is the basis of emotional attachment between two human beings. If you are not getting respect in a relationship so not expect your partner to love you. In case your interracial dating partner does not respect you he or she is there in the relationship for reasons other than love. You may be a stop gap arrangement or just an ATM for your dating partner. It is better to get out of the relationship as soon as possible rather than dealing with disrespectful behavior that keep berating your personality.

Being a mystery helps in an interracial relationship

Holding back a little bit of information about yourself, letting your partner discover you slowly and steadily will be an addition to your interracial relationship. Your partner will keep discovering new things about you almost every day some of which may be a surprise element for him or her. This will keep the spice up in your interracial relationship and you are going to enjoy your days with your interracial partner.

While planning dates in an interracial relationship be creative

For the first and second date choose a place that has ample of activities to do since these are the special moments you may cherish for life. Dating on weekends while camping in the woods under the open sky can be a big booster to your understanding and relationship. Activities that require a night out will be an option only once both the partners are comfortable with each other and can trust each other well. Going to a local band performance or a new eating joint or even taking an impromptu car trip to the next state will be a great idea for a date instead of sitting in the regular café you met in for the first time.

My Exploration of the Online Dating World

My Exploration of the Online Dating World

I am part of an ever growing group. The single mid-twenties. I am 25 and have NEVER (gasp) been in Love. I am not a needy headcase or a ditzy daddy’s girl, I have a lot to offer a guy and I get asked out at least once a week, but it’s never by the type of guy that I’d actually want to date. So, what’s a girl to do?

Well, this day and age there are two ways to do everything… (1) in the real world or (2) online. And dating is NO different, there are so many dating sites online it can leave a girl dizzy with possibilities (or confusion). I’ve always been a bit of a skeptic for online dating but last July my older sister married the man of her
dreams (whom she met online) so I thought I’d give it a real good look-over. and here is my assessment.

E-harmony.com is the one that gets the most advertising. and you can set up a profile for free (after taking the longest dating site personality quiz ever) and you can even get matches for free. BUT you have to join before you even see one face… and this to me is LAME. So I moved on.

Date.com you can also join this one for free and search the profiles (which you can’t do on eharmony) and even show interest in someone for free but beyond that you have to pay for any kind of communication.

Match.com has free membership and search as well and using their (alot shorter) personality quiz they even show you how many “matches” you and a certain person have and beyond that it’s about the same as date.com, you can send interest or a “wink” but to really communicate you have to become a paying member.

Plentyoffish.com is a completely free site. it lacks all the fancy web design and compatibility stuff that the other sites have but you can search and e-mail and even chat with online members completely free… there isn’t even an option to pay but this one is not as known as the others so you don’t have that great of a selection to choose from and my favorite online dating site- for which i’ll place a link below the article. is

millionairematch – free profile and search, free “wink” and my fav feature is, if you send interest to someone who IS a member they can e-mail you and you can e-mail them back, without being a paying member as long as they e-mail you first. plus the added bonus of seeing how much they make (not from a gold diggers point of view) so you can know weather or not they can afford to come meet you (should you live in separate states).

Anyhow there are a whole lot of other sites, but these are the ones I’ve checked out hope this helped you in your search for an online dating site, and happy hunting.